‘The Art and Power of Emphatic Listening’ – #1000SpeakForCompassion
‘The Art and Power of Emphatic Listening‘ -#1000Speak for Compassion
‘Listening has the quality of the wizard’s alchemy. It has the power to melt armor and to produce beauty in the midst of hatred’
I’ve been labeled as a listener since childhood because I always took more pleasure in listening to what others had to say and keeping that in my memory to hold forever. Sometimes, I get that astonished look from people when I quote an instance they once told me or a dialogue we once exchanged, back in the time, like, “Really, you still remember that?’ and whenever this happens, it gives me a strange pleasure.
No, my memory isn’t very sharp, just good enough to remember what we’ve talked about when I was listening and not just hearing.
Many-a-times, when we talk to people, our thoughts often go haywire on the mention of a single word that has a strong memory in our mind. To be able to suppress that urge of our mind to rewind our own memories rather than to listen to what the other person has to say takes a lot of courage. If you have that courage, then I must say you are a remarkable human being because when you are listening to someone attentively, you are not just listening to the words that are being spoken, but the feelings too that are related to what is being said.
What is more important than just listening?
When you listen to someone with the intention of sharing their feelings, that’s when you are listening compassionately. When you listen in order to lessen the suffering of the speaker, that’s when you are listening compassionately. Compassion is like water, it takes the shape of the vessel you put it in. Put it on your tongue and it’ll flow through your words, put it in your heart, it’ll flow through your body, put it in your ears, it’ll flow through your attention towards the people who speak to you.
When someone talks to you, they seek the comfort, the assurance that they are being listened to. Just give them that comfort and see how all your relationships fall into place. One thing that results in the fights we encounter every day with our family, friends or even strangers, is that we do not listen to them with compassion. We listen to the answer, not to understand. That’s what ends up being the reason for a fight.
To solve these fights, listen to them, their words, their feelings associated with what they are speaking about. You’ll see the difference and I assure you that the results will leave you full of joy unbound.
I found so many beautiful quotes on listening that I find it hard not to share them! Take a look:
Finally, this amazing poem by John Fox, ‘When Someone Deeply Listens to You‘ :
So, are you a compassionate listener?
Read more on #1000Speak:#1000Speak: Compassion begins at Home
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Existence of Compassion: Nature Vs Nurture
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